Have any of you been Buddhist in prison?

So for many years I did many dumb things, mostly drinking and fighting though nothing major.Eventually it escalated and one time I got caught. About 13 years ago I was busted for a burglary and arson.

Through some true legal magic and luck with witnesses everything got plead to 5 years probation.

Since then I came into Buddhism. They are not related. The thing is however that I've transformed over time into a (I like to think) USUALLY truly kind loving person in day-to-day life. This may not always reflect online but I am sometimes just 'eh' (wrong) or others simply come off wrong.

Almost a year ago I did something that is legal for nearly all americans. I knew while on probation it would be illegal for me but was told after probation it'd be legal again.

I have had some truly incredible luck with the legal system. I've never spent more than days in jail. Always got bailed out and decent attorneys/luck. That's when I didn't care.

While searching some dockets today (old criminal habit) I found new felonies filed tied to that thing from almost a year ago. Apparently it just took them some time. I will not explain too much as to not give myself away (details don't hurt, VERY specific details do) except to say it is tied to an outdoor activity many americans find fun. Imagination will make it simple enough if you're an outdoors person. Specifics aren't good though.

I have not been in jail or alike since getting off probation the last time. By the time said action was performed I believed it to be legal for me, or if illegal for me to be stopped which I was. I was told ahead of time I'd simply be stopped if it still weren't legal for me.

It really was an honest mistake but the law doesn't care. As they say something like "ignorance of the law is no defense" or something.

I'm facing almost a decade in prison now. I have to line up an attorney tomorrow but it'll be a fun process since I've since moved states.

If things don't work out, or I get them plead I'll be spending some time in prison.

It'll be hard to leave my family . I started it after getting straightened out. Luckily I truly trust my wife. I know many men think that but if you saw us you wouldn't think we were just husband and wife but best friends attached at the hip, really. We spend every waking second together except for when we need to work or the odd time she goes out with work friends. Our schedules allow this to line up.

I have tears streaming down my face just thinking here and I'm not even sure I'm going :/. I'm trying to not get sidetracked.

TO THE FUCKING POINT (I have to psych myself up here), have any of you been in prison? I got a buddy up there now who's doing alright. I've known some others who say MOSTLY people leave you alone if you mind your own business and don't stand out. Like if you see someone get shanked just drop your eyes to the ground and walk the other way.

The thing is I'm big on Samatha and very deep concentration.

I already know the noise will be a big distraction but that'll be good training I suppose.

What I'm questioning is, did people leave you alone? I could see sitting there meditating like a monk (as they'll see it, ignorance) all day making me stand out big time.

Also non-violence will be hard. When I got this news today I don't want to share my thoughts. My Buddhist mentality is breaking down fast. I feel myself being drawn to things I haven't even thought of in years. I'm losing myself though I'm sure I'll find a way to recover.

This isn't COMPLETELY set in stone yet but the odds are against me. I expect to be able to set my family up enough to last at first off savings but not for long. After however family/babysitters should be able to help while she works so I expect them to be intact when I'd get out. We've been through tough shit, I know she'll handle things.

Again this isn't set in stone. I'm kinda just freaking out and rambling because of the chances. I will lose my family temporarily but I know not forever. I think remaining a practicing Buddhist however would be one of the biggest challenges of my life and the fact is there's a lot of ignorant people out there that will fuck with you just for wanting to be too peaceful.

Mind you I'm talking prison/state, not a local county jail. I've never been in true prison.

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