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Why does it feel so hard to be a Buddhist?

I have been Buddhist for months meditating almost every day. I understand that not every meditation or thought is going to be easy on me. I know what we deem positive and negative is a subjective experience, however there are core values in Buddhism that I have a hard time expressing despite knowing. I want to acknowledge the suffering that is inside of me, but at the same time I'm afraid of giving it power to where I lose that calmness within my mind. I'm afraid of losing my agency and attaching myself to the negative emotions. How does one navigate their own emotions and suffering in a way that is appropriate? I keep finding myself saying "This is how a Buddhist would feel or do" but yet I find resistance when trying to replicate that. I just don't know what to do or think.

submitted by /u/ZaBardoOfficial
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