Speaking out my negative thoughts
HI everyone, i been practicing mindfulness for a little over 5yrs now, read,listen and watch videos by Eckhart Tolle and Mooji, meditate daily for 30 minutes, according to my research we are separate from the "thinker" rather we should see ourselves as the "observer" and just acknowledge our thoughts without trying to change them or possess them as we are not responsible for thoughts the "thinker" produces.
Most times im good at just watching my thoughts but never try to restrain or control them as i read a guru say "you can invite the "thinker" at home but dont serve them tea" lol, I am self conscious of a body part i have and get easily triggered thinking people are judging me and that makes me feel inferior in a way, yesterday i was at a stop light at a busy intersection, i ride a motorcycle and the negative thinking took over me, i targeted this innocent guy whos car was parked almost across from me , in my my negative thinking i was imagining this guy was judging me and making fun of me , so I proceeded to actually say out loud what i was thinking, directed at the person i said some vile and insulting words and im sure with all the traffic noise he didnt even hear me but it shocks me how i let the "thinker" take over so in plain sight and directly, if that guy did hear me i would be in in trouble as most likely a fight would occur.
Writing this post and actually acknowledging i did this horrible act scares me as i never let the thinker get out of control to this extent.
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from Buddhism https://ift.tt/2ESOsfB
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